Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Why Stephen King Is Just The Worst

Because he's old and terrible. 

The man who named Buckcherry's Black Butterfly as the best album of 2008 should never be allowed to comment on anything remotely related to pop culture. Yet he continues to write an awful column for Entertainment Weekly (yes, I have a subscription, because I am a girl) where he muses on irrelevant artists and topics pandering to middle-age readers but mostly just to himself. His latest opus is a glorious slice of cheese where he lists all the songs that he gets stuck in his head -- he calls them 'earworms' -- and then follows up each one with a witty observation or piece of advice. When a reader mentions she's had the Sesame Street theme song in her head for over 30 years, the comedy master offers these insatiable words: "Get this woman a doctor!"

That's why Stephen King is just the worst. Read the whole scanned column after the jump, or spare yourself and don't. 

Click to enlarge.

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